Missing You

You took care of me as a baby and looked out for me into my teens. I've known you for twenty six years of my life and I am blessed for each one but it just doesn't seem long enough. 

On a beautiful summers day you thought me how to use a skipping rope in the middle of your kitchen. I can remember the laughter as if it was yesterday. You showed me how to bake fairy buns topped with icing and sprinkles (my obsession with sprinkles had begun!) and you showed me how to get the biscuit base of your delicious lemon cheesecake just right.

I remember the jumper you knitted me for my sixth birthday, it had daisies on the collar and pretty ribbons on the sleeves. I'm sure it took you ages to make and I had no idea or appreciated it at the time but it's a memory that always stuck with me. I want you to know that I loved it.

You had the softest skin which I will always associate with the bottle of Oil of Ulay (Olay) sitting on your dressing table since as far back as I can remember. When I'm visiting mam I always sneak some of hers and it reminds me of you. 

You liked to be called “Nana", nan or nanny just wouldn't do!  Going on the hunt for birthday cards with “Nana” on them was always a funny reminder of this. I went into Hallmark today to pick up a father’s day card and I realised I won’t be buying Nana cards anymore. 

I remember you and granddad took myself and the boys to the Phoenix Park to feed the ducks quite a bit, always making sure we never got too close to the water or ran too far from your sight. We were little terrors and of course never listened. Your poor nerves must have been shot! 

Now you are looking down on us, watching over us. Lots of things have been reminding me of you since you left and there have been a few split second moments when I've forgotten you are no longer with us and I thought to myself "Nana would like this, I must tell her later" Which made me feel bad. I just can't believe you're gone. My heart still aches in sadness and secret tears still flow but I have many happy memories which make me smile also. 

Your memory is my keepsake, with which I'll never part. 

Lot's of love,

Sarah